Wednesday, April 30, 2014

april goals recap // may goals

guys. i'm pretty happy with myself. this month of goals went really great and it makes me want to do it again! which is what i hoped for. i didn't want to come out feeling like a loser on the first round. this gives me a little oomf and a great start! so let's review shall we?

always hang up clothes. boom. i thought this was going to be so so hard. but not even one little time did i leave my clothes out. i have been doing it for years, and all it took was a little goal, a little determination, and a little planning [putting the hanger on my bed instead of leaving it in the closet].

keep up the budget. at all costs. i did preeeetty good with this one. there are a couple things i would have liked to have done better, like recording spending more frequently instead of in big chunks, but overall i'm pretty pleased with out well i kept up and didn't miss anything!

take time for baby. i'm still learning tons about this little pip-squeak. reading books, taking our class. i haven't spent as much time in this area as i had hoped, too, but i'm still happy with my progress. brock and i also started painting her dresser! Eek! It is going to be so precious! every day we plan to finish it, though, it's too windy to spray paint.... soon, i hope! next step: paint the room.

start my spring cleaning list. totally started this! and accomplished quite a bit, too! brock actually did part of it, i can't take credit for it. he power washed the house. check. we trimmed our scraggly bushes. check. i cleaned out all the top cupboards in my kitchen. check. and my ocd is very happy. just have to do the bottom now. 

like i said, overall, i'm really happy with myself. still room to improve, but let's be real.... that's an always kind of thing. so now it's time to make a few more goals for the next month while keeping up with the old ones. may, here i come.  

may is either going to stress me out, or be extremely relieving. this is the final full month of the honeymoon life/baby prep. once june rolls around, little lady could show up any day! there is a lot to do! I'm going to attempt to keep things simple for my own sanity, but if you see any bald spots on my head at the end of the month, it's only because I pulled my hair out. no big deal. 

get ready for little lady. ok, i'm going to break this on down into a couple steps. it's by far the biggest thing to do this month, but it will all be great!

     exercise! i walk almost everyday at lunch. just for 10 minutes so i have time to eat, but it really helps keep the afternoon sleepies and swelling down. however, since i will be having a natural birth, walking just isn't enough. i did really good with my pregnancy exercises in the beginning, but haven't been doing as good lately. so in addition to my walking, i'm planning on exercising 3 times each week. 

     finish the nursery. this one may be lofty. we'll see how far we can get. at least, the dresser will be finished and the walls will be painted. she won't be sleeping in there right away, so i do have a little wiggle room. decorating can come when i no longer work starting in june.  

     gather all the list items. back to the home birth part. we have a lot to gather up. our midwife gave us a list of things we will need. most of them have been collected, but i am still lacking a few necessary items. like extra towels [the two of us just don't have that many!], a tarp to go under the tub/pool/thingy, and first little outfit for little lady! hopefully, i can get it all together before the home visit from the midwife in two weeks. 

get the blog in order. may 30th is my official last day as a working woman. before that comes, i would really like to be ready to just delve into being a mama and a blogger. i have been talking about making a lot of changes, and by the time i am home for good, i would like to have a head start on this. that means i will have some happiness posts a-rolling and my new design and fresh look will be ready to launch [and possibly new url??]. everyone keep those fingers crossed. 

there you have it. somehow, 4 seems to be my lucky number. but like i said, i don't want to stress myself out. wish me luck everyone. life is about to fliiiiiip upside down. in a good way, but man! it's all happening so fast! 

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

a happy kind of direction

as you probably guessed from the last post, i have been doing a lot of thinking. and a lot of pondering. and a lot of soul searching. the bottom line is, i want to make a difference. i want to change lives. it's kind of a big dream to have, but i can't help it.

i realize that doesn't really happen overnight, and it certainly won't be something on a check list to accomplish, but i'm up for the challenge. i want to do something important and meaningful. really, i just want to help people. 

in all my pondering, something has really stuck out to me: i'm just a happy person. and i want to help everyone else be happy, too. only a million times have i participated in the activity where everyone goes around the room and says one good thing about each person. for me there have been different answers, but there are a couple things that have been pretty consistent throughout my life:

you always have a smile
you make people laugh
you're friendly and make people feel loved
you always make me happy

to me, that means the world.  i'm so grateful that people see me that way. because that's who i want to be. also in my pondering i have been trying decide how i can impliment my desires and goals into this blog and actually do something meaningful. and so i have been thinking about the things in my life that make me happy, the things that are most important to me and how i can help other people find happiness through those things, or just on their own! i know i had a rambling list last week, but i've narrowed it down to the things that matter most.

my faith. i am a member of the church of jesus christ of latter day saints, and though i don't plan on talking and blogging specifically about my beliefs, i think it's important for me to include in this list. not because it's important to me, but because it is me. all of the things that make me happy are because of what i believe and how i feel about this life and its purpose. 

marriage. this had to make the list. people probably think brock and i are crazy, lucky, or just downright weird.... but we are just ridiculously happy. i really don't know if i could have "planned" a better marriage thus far. 

motherhood. even though i don't have the experience in this yet, it has always been important to me, it has always been something that i have looked forward to. i always wanted to be as amazing as my mama [still do!]. i know when my little lady gets here, it will become an even bigger part of my happiness.

health. our bodies are truly magnificent things and what an incredible gift we have been given! i'm pretty grateful that i have this body to take care of and i actually do find happiness in knowing i'm doing a pretty good job of that. 

talents. for me, that means creating things. it's what i love to do, but i know that's not the same for everyone. that's great! hopefully, i can encourage you to find happiness in your own. 

lifting others. i guess this goes back to my whole refocus here, but i plan to do much more in this area than just talking about happy things. i guess you will just have to wait and find out with me. 

the little things. we all have hard times, life is tricky and daunting and tough. but those little things make all the difference! sometimes we just need to be reminded to enjoy those things, appreciate them, take advantage of them, and use them! 

and last but not least...

creating happiness. i'm a firm believer that we shouldn't rely on others for our happiness. sometimes we have to make our own. i hope as this vision expands and progresses, i can do just that. create happiness. and help you figure out how to do that, too. 

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

to be or not to be

two years ago [give or take], i started blogging. it began as a journal of my new life as a wife in arkansas for all the people i left behind in arizona.... mostly my mama. then i tried out food blogging. that got old, so i ventured into other paths, and now i don't even know what kind of category you would put me in. and that bothers me.

i sit here wondering, what do i have to offer? what good can i do anyway? is anyone even reading this outside of the people i actually know [thank you, guys by the way!!]? but mostly i wonder... who the heck am i?

i'm not a food blogger. as much as i love eating, and cooking, and eating, i hate food blogging. i don't follow recipes, i don't like writing recipes either. i'm the kind of chef who uses a little of this and a squirt of that. yeah, i know you all hate me. and i think i spend too much time mentally preparing meals and grocery lists, that when dinner is over, i don't want to think about food anymore. food blogging just isn't for me.

i'm not a mom blogger. when my sister first found out i was pregnant, she asked me are you gonna have a super cute mom blog?? my first thought was omg! yes! the thought that followed immediately after was heeeeck no! i don't want to be just another mom blogger. i don't have anything against you lovely ladies, i will goo and gah over your children, home, and blog for as long as i live, i just don't want to be one.

i'm not a design blogger. even though most of the blogs i read are design blogs [like this one, this one, this one, and this one]. i could look at those all day! but i'm not a designer, in any shape or form of the word, so i won't pretend to be.

i'm not a craft blogger. i craft. just not enough, or well enough to be like boom, look what i did, here's a tutorial. oh whoops, i forgot to take pictures of the process. story of my life. 

soooo.... what then? i don't have a niche. i don't have a specific skill. i don't own a store or shop or anything like that. i don't have one passion. i care too much about a lot of things. i like doing a lot of things. i'm fairly good at a lot of things but not an expert at anything. 

so the next question i ask myself is, what's important to me? what do i think about most? what could i never tire of talking about? what makes me happy?

god. my family. making people happy. food. home projects. health. music. crafts. being with people. art. travel. kids. being self sufficient. gardening. flowers. should I keep going? nah... that's enough to think about. and think, i do. all the time. trying to figure it out.

so i'm asking for a little patience. forgive the infrequency of posts. and expect random ones about new things to pop up as i test out the waters. i have thoughts in my brain. lots of thoughts. lots of directions. i think that may be another problem. i'm a thinker. i think way too much. ask brock. he will testify. many of my thoughts are useless [or just way too early for him. ha!]. i guess we'll all just have to wait and see what happens. 

Thursday, April 10, 2014

a little lady update

here we are at 29 weeks. time has flown! but it also feels like i've been pregnant forever!

last sunday was the official first day of my third trimester, and ho! they warned me that's when the hormones would just overtake me... i didn't realize that meant day one. for a couple days, i thought i might die from heat stroke. that coming from the girl who wears socks to bed or sticks her toes on her hubby's legs for warmth. i was also very angry at the stupid target app. i don't want to talk about it....

note to friends and family: i am excruciatingly testy. highly likely to become irritated with minor things. like your voice. or air. you have been warned. 

also, i think these hormones have actually dried out my tear ducts. no crying or emotional relapses of sorrow. i can't even remember the last time i cried... and that's weird. [actually, that's a lie... it was probably the first time i saw frozen.]

in other news, the little lady is as wiggly as they come. and always at 10pm. every night. I guess that's just prepping me for her debut. she doesn't kick intensely, she just rolls and squirms around all the time. either that, or she has taken up dancing because it is literally an all-belly show all day. she's probably gonna be just like mama. can't sit still for longer than 2 whole minutes. hopefully she doesn't inherit my childhood boney butt, too. everyone hated my boney, wiggly butt on their lap. 

brock already loves playing with her. his favorite activity is to poke and prod her and wait for her to punch back. he's usually successful. thanksbabeloveyoutoo.

we've probably been through a million names. shelby. charly. abigail. sadie. mckinna. ebony. emma. i think we have it now! but i'm not going to tell you... yet. i don't wanna jinx it.  

the nursery is still trying to make it's way from my brain to real life, but we have a crib! and i will be painting her dresser in the next week or so. oh, it is going to be lovely! just wait. 

it will only be so long until she is here, then you can all fall in love with her as much i have. 

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

april goals and living in the present

one quarter of the year is officially over. two trimesters of this pregnancy are in the bag. it has been one year since i have seen my family.

there are only eight and half weeks left of my job. eleven and a half approximately until this little lady arrives, along with my family. my brother will be home from his mission in six months.

is anyone else stressed or depressed now? oh, brock would be so disappointed right now if he were reading this [wait up, babe]. just last night he said we live too much in the past and in the future. we need to live more in the present. and you know what, he is totally right [there you go]. that way up there ^^^ that's how my brain functions. especially in the future with little lady on the way. i stress and plan [usually over plan] too much to enjoy what's happening right now. 

last week, brock and i took a little babymoon of a vacation and let me tell you, it was just what we needed. we had a list of things we wanted to do, but the planning consisted of "what should we do tomorrow?" and then we did it. it was lovely.

that being said, i can, in no way, live my life like that. but i can simplify. one of my favorite bloggers, kory, shares her goals for each month and recaps on how she did the previous month. i love reading those posts. it's great to hear other humans succeeding, not quite succeeding, growing, adapting, and moving forward. 

and now it's my turn. i have some goals that are simple that i have set for april. i'm not going to promise that i will do this each month, because my present right now is the next four weeks. i'm going to enjoy being pregnant and not wish it away faster. i'm going to enjoy my time with my hubby and soak it up while i can. i'm going to pay attention to what is happening around me and not just put my brain in future mode making lists and lists of unaccomplishable tasks. i'm going to keep them basic, because presently, that's what i need. come the end of the month, i'll see where i'm at.

always hang up clothes. i have this terrible habit of throwing my clothes on my dresser. i change my clothes 2-3 times a day between work, exercise, lounging, and outings, so yes, i wear things more than once. when i shared a room with my sister, my clothes were usually on the end of my bed frame. no more i say! i'm changing that. i'm going to start a new habit. a habit of hanging up my clothes and keeping all flat surfaces in the bedroom clothing-free.

keep up the budget. at all costs. ha. see what i did there? since the beginning of the year, i have been trying to be more conscious of our money flow. we've used things like mint and excel spreadsheets, but i just prefer writing things like that. it's weird. i don't even use my phone or ipad for my calendar because i'd rather doodle it. it's time consuming. but whatevs. i can't use technology for budgets and calendars. sue me. the last three months have been not so good with my record keeping. this month, i will change that!

take time for baby. i feel like i haven't been prepping myself enough lately, and i need to do better. i have started reading two excellent books [the thinking woman's guide to a better birth and the womanly art of breastfeeding] and i want to finish them before little lady comes along. i also need to practice my relaxation exercises! muy importante. side note: brock and i are taking a natural birth class... so fab! but really, relaxation is going to be a big help when the time comes, i just need to practice some of the techniques.

start my spring cleaning list. aka nesting. it's not an extensive list. but things need to be done for my sanity and so i don't have to hate them when little lady is here and i can't do them... like reorganize my kitchen cupboards, dust the blinds, etc. [already washed out the fridge when i thought we had spilled rotten meat and turned out to be a dead possum in the insulation under the fridge area of the house].

they're not lofty, but they are a start and i need them. do you have monthly goals? i'd love to hear them!